I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I need a burrito and a hug.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
