The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
We talked him into tasing himself.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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