these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
