THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize