week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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