I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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