i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
