I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Randomize