fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
