hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
that is very illegal...i love you.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
