And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
They are going to name an STD after you.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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