Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
