you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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