i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
