Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
