508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
