I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Come see our sink grown plant.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Randomize