this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
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