I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
