I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
