i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
