His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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