Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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