My brain says no but my pants say off.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
