I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
