got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
