I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
