The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
