Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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