Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
