What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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