no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
