Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
