I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize