Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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