Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
