There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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