3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
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