She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize