Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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