Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
