Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
This house was built for laser tag.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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