guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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