in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
