We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize