So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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