Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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