Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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