I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
