You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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