btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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