Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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